First the dad: When my husband and I had our first baby we knew nothing about being parents. While I would freak,head off to the search engine, or call the doctor for every little thing that was going on with our newborn, my hubby would settle back and just let our little guy fret, snuggle, then calm down. This laid back attitude would drive me nuts. Little did I know I was going through my own crazy hormones that happen after babies (no one told me this!). When I would fret too much, my hubby would do the same with me, the cuddles would come on, he would listen and hem and haw when needed and usually my worries would go away. Well now it has been 6 years and one child more, life has happened, most of it wonderful and some of it sad. Still my hubby will let me do my own freaking but he stands firm as the rock in the family that we all head to be “put to rights.” Thank you my love for being the one I can always run to, for being my best friend, and a great dad.
Second story is about an Uncle: My little brother is huge and the stereotypical macho military man through and through with a heart of gold and has been my side kick throughout life. Our time away from each other started when I went off to college and he went off to the army. School, Marriage, overseas jobs, and deployment kept us from seeing each other that much. But he was still my Dunky Poo. When I found out I was going to have my first child I think he was even more excited then I was, I was more at the freakout stage. It is a pretty common stage for me to be in. When I told him he would be my son’s namesake he was even more excited. Well my son came and my brother was overseas at them time. He finally got to meet Kadun when he was just a bit over a year old. Me came, picked up my son, and that was the end of the story it was always him and Kadun doing this or that the whole visit. Now him and Kadun have their own relationship in which mom is not included, but that is good. My brother gives Kadun stuff mom will never do, such as playing on a motorcycle and such. There is a reason uncles are important and one of them is to give your kids a taste of freedom and love that does not come with parental supervision. So thank you Bro for being a awesome uncle and a wonderful brother.
“I don’t like him.” “He is mean,” were the words that tore my heart out and stomped it to the ground . This was coming from a friend’s son who I had invited over for a holiday party. He was talking about my autistic 5 year old son. My son was up in one of the trees doing his own thing ignoring the rest of the children at the party as is his normal way of dealing with too many people. He ignores or does his own thing, sometimes coming out of his own world to interact but still doing it in his own way, with his own idea of boundaries that he will not cross. Such as play the games like everybody else in tag, putting down the sprinkler while everybody yells at him to because he is entranced with the workings of the sprinkler, or stop pushing children on the swing after he believes he is doing what is social correct as he was asked to push them. These social cues are lost on him and other children usually can not understand why he is not like them and do like they do. So they don’t like him and call him mean, where there is not a hurtful bone in my son’s body. We actually called him the “yoga baby” because of his extremely peaceful nature. This nature did not start to worry me until he would just walk away from being pushed around by another child at the park. It made me worry about his self confidence. So with that little back ground you can imagine how I react to a non delayed child judging my son, especially as this child had been in his life since babyhood. Mommy Bear shoved to the surface, but as they are both important to me it is more important to me that I bring them together then tear them apart by saying “fine you don’t understand then you don’t play together.” Instead I sat him down and our conversation went like this:
me: “See that tree he is in.”
me: “what do you see”
child: ” A tree”
me: ” Well he see’s leafs, bark, bugs, pointy sticks, as well as hears the rattle of the branches, us having fun, the birds singing, the smell of the BBQ and a lot more. All of this is knocking on his head wanting his attention while you also say something. His mind is just a little bit busy, but if you wait he will get to you.”
child: “yeah, his head is busy.”
me: “yep, he likes you and your are his friend, you just have a special way of communicating. It is secret.”
And off this child who had broke my heart went and mended it the next second while he ofcourse yelled at my son to get down, waited for him and then dragged him off to get more cupcakes. Why I am sharing this story is because it is important to have our autistic children socialize and interact with others but it is also important for parents to try to explain how their child is so others can understand them. This is not always easy and can feel heart wrenching. But in the end you are the adult, your job is to guide your child through the trails and tribulations they may have. Making sure their friends know the real them is one of them.
- ~Awe inspiring autism~ (spongeoforiginality.wordpress.com)
- Have You Been Carly’d Recently? (theconnorchronicles.wordpress.com)
- Opinion: Expanded definition of ‘autism’ goes astray (nj.com)
I find fans of Wang Ming are usually children btw/ the ages of 2-10 but I have caught a few teenagers enjoy it also. At my readings I usually get parents who are excited about the environmental outlook and cultural input that has been put into the book. Children are in love with Wang Ming’s adventures and the colorful book. All fans are usually animal lovers as well as panda lovers. At one reading I had a mother open my book and say “I’ve been there.” It was a great experience to share our stories of the bamboo forest and I knew that she would tell her own story to her children while reading Wang Ming. I am a fan of Wang Ming myself because he represents many of my own beliefs and and admiral traits I have found in others. When building a character you draw from what you know and I hope that by doing this I created a character who pulls into himself my own coexistence message, respect of culture & family, and a trust in yourself. Fans of Wang Ming are ones who will appreciate this also while wanting a fun and colorful book to grow with.